fancifullove

In grade school, you are are taught

that the world is composed of formulas.

E=mc²

y=mx+b

c²=a²+b²

You’re guaranteed to get the answer, they say,

if only you plug in the right values.

In adolescence, you are taught

that formulas ensure certain outcomes.

Kindness given = kindness received

Safety = prudence + precaution

Success = work + time

You’re guaranteed to get the results, they say,

if only you plug in the right actions.

What they don’t tell you is how equations

Are caged by hypotheticals.

I never knew the instability of an equal sign

Until the first time I failed a test was also

the time I studied the hardest.

Because life doesn’t add up when

He prefers her > you

Or when time ≠ healing

And when all you’ve done is < enough.

I’ve heard people say that life isn’t fair.

But what I think they mean

Is that life isn’t linear.

It goes up and down

Through and around

In equations only the Father knows.

Jesus, author of all,

Is unbound by formula.

With two fish and five loaves, five thousand were fed.

With water and jars, wine was made.

With one life given, many are saved.

Death = life

Light > darkness

First < last

Equations don’t translate to flesh and blood

To sinew and bone

To timelines and hearts.

Only presence, patience, and care can.

In adulthood, I am learning.

To engage with life

not by formulas

but with love.